In this insightful interview, filmmaker Dieu Hao Do delves into the emotional and complex process of uncovering his Chinese Vietnamese family’s history in the wake of the Vietnam War. Do shares how silence, unprocessed grief, and the challenges of diaspora shaped his latest film. He reflects on the emotional act of listening, the difficulty in convincing family members to participate, and how his experience mirrors a collective memory of displacement and trauma.

Q: In the years before you decided to make this film, how did you feel about the relative silence and non-responsiveness from your family when you asked them questions about their past?

A: I never asked my other family members until then. I had most of the conversations with my mother. Whenever I asked, she talked specifically about our family’s time in Cholon before and after 1975: the expropriation of the house, the break-up of the family, my aunt and uncle’s escape, forged papers, re-education camps – there was so much unprocessed grief. They lived far away from each other on three continents after the Fall of Saigon. It was only when my third uncle died in Germany that I began to look into the history of my siblings. At first, I felt overwhelmed, but sometimes that’s a good thing. It was also so emotional and touching, and I had so many questions still. 

Q: Were there any challenges in interviewing, let alone connecting with, family members you had scarcely known before production began?

A: For quite a while, I was very afraid to ask. Looking back, maybe it wasn’t the fear of asking, but sitting with them and actually being present and listening to their complicated stories. Listening can be such a physical act sometimes, especially when it comes to trauma. 

Q: Was there any resistance from your family members when they learned about this project?

A: My aunt in Los Angeles was really hard to convince. My cousin helped me to convince her. My mom also kept telling me: “You have to be careful what you film and show of our family.” For me, it was a lot about uncovering and working and understanding each other’s shame. Making this film was so important to me because I knew that this experience was not just the experience of one family, but that it was part of a collective memory. Viet Thanh Nguyen’s book “Nothing Ever Dies” also helped me a lot to find words for all the unprocessed experiences and the politics behind it. I just love the quote: “All wars are fought twice, the first time on the battlefield, the second time in memory.”

Q: What surprised you the most while learning more about your family while making this film?

A: I was pretty naive assuming that they wouldn’t want to talk about it. When I started filming, they had so much to say. Sometimes it was very confusing. Memories can be like a sandstorm. What really moved me was the deep-seated, unprocessed grief, the disappointment and anger about the past. For a long time in the process of editing, I was overwhelmed by the resentment between the siblings. But now I know: it’s pretty common in families. 

Q: Did the places where your relatives eventually settled (Germany, Hong Kong, Southern California, and your one uncle who remained in Vietnam) color the way they interpreted the strife within your family?

A: Perhaps I wouldn’t put it like that. Of course, it’s obvious to see that their experiences in the diaspora shaped them differently. What they all had in common was the strong sense of loneliness. I had this impression especially with my uncle in Vietnam. He is the only one who did not leave Vietnam, despite several attempts to escape imprisonment. He had also experienced separation, but I also knew that he had stayed in Saigon his whole life and didn’t have to build a new life in a different country, a different culture. I don’t have a definitive answer to the question about the others. It is such a complex and multi-layered process that will continue to have an impact on future generations. 

Interviewer: Eric Nong

Hao Are You (Germany; dir. Dieu Hao Do), In-Person Screening on Saturday 10/12 at 10 am, with a screening of Motherland prior and a Q&A afterwards – Virtual At-Home Screening from October 5 to 20


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